Oh this beloved, free nation of mine

Caught up now in a time of choice

For 23 years I desired to vote

For 23 years I yearned to choose

But alas, it wasn’t to be

Never to be, not even this year

I once lamented and achingly longed

As a man of this land that ballot to cross

Twas denied of me and denied yet again

But now, my friends, I no longer grieve

I learned today, that a blessing this is

Why? Why? Why? I hear the mounting protest

My happy friends, my dear fellow citizens

I cast my heavy head with shameful admission

That as a man, as a mere mortal creation

I cannot be perfect, I have my flaws

I fear most deeply of a distracted mind

I fear most painfully of a memory lapse

Oh, my fellow man, my citizen friends

My recurring nightmare, I fear comes alive

A thought haunts me again and again

Picture with me, my friend, if you will

I sojourn with trepidation to cast my vote

This man, with careful steps, draws into the booth

The heavy, irrevocable ink I raise in my hands

To cast, for the first time, to complete my soul

And lo! And now! I need the loo to go!

What’s a man to do? Where’s a man to go?

So, to the loo, I have to journey to

But alas! As I complete the odiferous task

As a man must do, I heave in satisfied relief

Finally trudge out that room into the sun

But no! Oh no! That unholy distraction!

That ballot, that tick, oh my mind!

Alas! Unpredictable bowels halted my dream

And another passage of time, must I painfully wait

But no! The journey, my friends end not here

This poor man, has unwittingly partaken

Has been immortalized in grainy CCTV

My brown body and soul has been dragged

Through the mud of my own and loved land

This man has thrown mud and been disgraced

A reluctant subversive to the holy election

My name, smashed on the head by grainy film

My name, dragged through the slime, the mud

Oh my bowels, I forgive you, my memory, I sympathize

But the slime will forever cling to this hirsute body

You see my friends, my follow citizens, that is why

I am joyful and rejoice

in not having

to vote